Thursday, July 13, 2017

Equality-Inequality-Poverty-Moral Virtue-Gayness from the Gospel According to Right-Wing Jesus

Amen, amen I say unto you, equality is best sought through exercise of the free market, not through government laws, regulations, or programs that restrict those who are in superior positions or who have superior talents.

Hear my words, o ye men of God, inequality is the natural order of things. Human beings, in terms of innate talents and personal attributes, are inherently unequal and a social hierarchy is a natural consequence of that inequality.

The poor will always be among you, but the righteous know that poverty is caused by negative individual personality traits and character defects—including laziness, poorly developed intellectual ability, complaisance, and the lack of competitiveness, frugality, self-discipline, responsibility, and self-reliance, etc.—not by the so-called structural socioeconomic conditions imagined by liberals.

O you men of God, ignore the sophistry of the liberal Pharisees who created social safety net programs like Medicaid, Food Stamps, and WIC to reward godless people who refuse to work. Repeal or reductions of those programs that protect low-income families against catastrophe stem not from misguided hostility but godly fiscal responsibility in policing fraud and ensuring efficiency (meaning removing all the lazy work shirkers who had previously been eligible).

Hear ye o people of God, race-based affirmative action and the women's rights movement are agents of the devil himself that foster prejudice by undermining equality and by denying opportunities to those who are equally or more qualified to serve the Lord and the government. Those misbegotten programs created by liberal Pharisees do a great deal more harm than good by generating anger and resentment against the particular communities they pretend to serve and actually promote the very disharmony they supposedly are called upon to alleviate.

Medicaid is welfare for the undeserving and irresponsible. The best way to cut down on the innate fraud of that system is to force adults on Medicaid to work, require enrollees to get tested for illegal drugs, cap the length of time people can stay on the program, and limit the number of people who can be on the program at once. Millions of lazy, undeserving work shirkers stay on Medicaid when they are no longer eligible.

Chaste, spiritually minded, and religious people are favored by the Lord God and are morally superior to those weak-kneed, back sliding sinners who are not.

Hear ye o people of God, a powerful centralized government threatens the individual, family, and private institutions and seeks uniformity and absolute compliance on the part of weak-willed citizens. Government, by its very nature, is inefficient, incompetent, wasteful, power hungry, and morally corrupt.

Hear my words ye men of God, homosexuality is an unnatural abomination, a lifestyle choice people freely make; those who practice it commit inherently repugnant and evil acts. Homosexual acts are as immoral as incest and bestiality. Know ye that same sex unions are a direct threat to marriage and the family.

Local governance is godly only if the local jurisdiction is conservative. If it’s not conservative, conservative politicians who control the state legislature must revoke whatever local regulations have been passed to help the undeserving and irresponsible poor, like higher minimum wage laws.

As ordained by godly men, women of childbearing age and older are obliged to cover their bodies entirely, no matter if they claim that dress makes them uncomfortable and hot. For it is written that no woman should salaciously tempt innocent men with their disgusting, slutty, and all but irresistible exposed flesh.


Let us pray, you people of God, for conservatives who “put faith and family, not government and bureaucracy, at the center of [their] lives.” And thank you, Brother Donald, for that inspiration.

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Can I get a chorus of loud AMENS brothers and sisters to that good news of the gospel according to Right-Wing Jesus?

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